I look at my mom with worry hoping she would catch on but she just flashes a smile at me. Jesus Christ. I can’t take this. She’s throwing away perfectly good food. My food. MINE! YOU’RE TAKING AWAY MY CONTROL!
A ball is churning. Rubber smell, Almost yearning. A small rash in my private place. A private place at my face. Questions attacking me. I cannot explain. Someone’s coming. This time, who’s to blame? False alarm. Memory goes black. Self protection. Body under attack. Child shuts down. Don’t bother with sound. No answers. You’re bound.
The first thing – well no – perhaps the third thing you would notice about me is my consistent inconsistencies. I feel like I should explain why I’m like this not out of necessity but because it’s the entire reason I decided to write this blog. I’m not alone which means others are not alone […]
I haven’t forgotten that day because I felt awful. I knew that they worked well together in that way because they had learned from an early age how to survive on their own. They have only ever had each other. Sadness punched me in the gut.
It’s the revolving door. The viciousness of hell. I feel like the hamster on the wheel that just keeps going around and around and if I dare stop I’m going to flip and break something. I remember where I went wrong. It was a bowl of almond Hershey kisses that sat on a bedside table. […]
I’ve been gone and the blog went empty. Where did The Starving Fat Lady go? I have so much to tell you. I want to begin by first saying – I’m back. I’m back to face my demons and to expose my soul. I need to start facing the facts. I was successful in losing […]
The morning sun kisses the back of my neck, wrapping itself around me from behind. Its warmth makes me feel secure and safe. I sip on hot coffee and let the steam blanket my face as I throw one leg up on the bench next to me. The large oak tree stands hundreds of feet […]