Failing Success

You’d think a wake up call would magically appear and scream, “Get your ass in gear!” Why can’t I just eat what I want? What I’m used to? When I was younger I remember binge eating and then telling myself, “OK, that was a lot so for the next few days you can’t eat nearly as much and you won’t gain weight.” I really had myself convinced it worked like that. Now….forget about it. I can’t shed an ounce no matter if I starve myself or not. My old body has slowed to a halt. I swear I heard the brakes screech at thirty.

I can’t count how many times I’ve laid in bed at night thinking of all the spectacular things I planned to start in the morning. Clean out a cupboard, eat healthy, help an old lady cross the road, conquer the world, you know. I wake up with the best of intention. Then….noon hits. I’m tired and over it. Mission aborted. Like I said, my intentions were good. So good in fact, that I’ve successfully started and stopped several “diets.” HCG, grapefruit, Weight Watchers, juicing, nutritionists, smoothies..the list goes on. My failing success. 

I think it’s a common misconception, by some, that obese people sit, do nothing,  and eat all day. Reality is, that’s not true for everyone. There are days I do nothing else but run, (figuratively speaking of course). Of course, I still find time to take in a ho-ho or four.  Take, for example, my youngest daughter. Skinny as skinny can be and that 16 year old does……….nothing. She eats, sleeps, checks her iPhone, eats, and sleeps again. I see her two times a day. She emerges from her room, uses the restroom and checks to see if I’ve cooked anything. How she manages to stay so thin is beyond me.  My point is, finding something that will aid in my weight loss may be different from anyone else. An overweight person can eat and starve and still be obese or exercise and be active but make the wrong food choices, thus, stay overweight. What worked for Joan may not work for Jane. I hope to one day find that miracle “cure.” For now, hand me that plate of food and back away!


One thought on “Failing Success

  1. I feel your pain, my question is not why are we fat but why do we overeat and why does our bodies insist on keeping the fat rather than using it up? some doctors have said it is not a matter that you eat but rather a deficiency in abiility to access the energy once it is stored. it is a non use issue not an overeating issue.(indirectly) I have struggled iwth obesity all my life tried one type of diet supplement exercise you name it, I mean when i would start a diet or change over the logic seemd sound on why this works or why this supplement works yadda yadda and each time experience proves that cure was no cure at all, and did not address the underlying cause. had done the research done the experiemtnation, and after more than 35 years of it, I have had enough. I will just stop trying and concentrate on making sure to get enough nutrients like vita min and such from my food and try to incororate fruits and veggies as much as I can. I will just learn to live with this obesity that has become a disability. I surly cannot do the things I love but I still can do some things. not saying it is hopless for you you may stumble on something that actually works for you and addresses the underlying cause and such. I hope you do. I am tired of trying this that and the other thing. not saying I have not had improvements in my health in other ways, but as forlosing this weight nope. my body wants it for some reason (other wise it would up my energy levels and down the appetite. after all I dont overeat because I feel like I do so because I am hungry) so unless we can find out why our bodies hold onto something that is supposed to be unhealthy for us then nothing will work long term nor increase our health viatlity and well being.


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